THIS IS FUNNY!!!

This was on a guys profile.

XXXXX  (NO ID NAMES LISTED) is married and has kids!!!!contact his wife! # one seven # one three zero 1 nine nine. I took his last profile to his house to show her!! This is his fifth different profile since he tried to hook up with me! He doesn't even look like this anymore.
The number signs have replaced actual numbers as to not identifiy this guy. I went to read the guys profile and this was on it....WTH!!! I laughed and thought I would share....is he being REALLY FUNNY or has someone hacked his account and he just doesn't know it!!!

oh well, on  to the next one.....

This is FUNNY!!!! **I stole this from a guy's profile**

Hello everyone,
I'm a 34 year old catch that lives with my mom and is looking for someone to replace her or atleast transition into working along side her to bide for my affection. I've never had a girlfriend per se but I never really started noticing girls until I overcame my porn addiction last year.
I've been trying to get my GED and then DeVry University here I come! My dream is to sell the ultimate video game idea and live off the royalties. I have this really cool idea about this boy who fights with a sabre of light and chooses the dark side of things and grows up to have twins with a queen who dies in child birth. Well the boy twin later learns the dark guy is his father and fights him and looses a hand. Yet he still believes in his dad and ultimately redeems him in the end and overthrows the dark side of things. And there is this little green guy with pointy ears and-well you get the idea. Feedback would be appreciated.
What makes me unique? I've never been arrested-in this county, I shower once a week, I can eat my own dandriff, and I like dining in the nude. My ultimate first date would be wherever mom feels like driving us to. She usually prefers Denny's.

Now, if you have made it this far, you are a very patient and accepting person. Just what I need :) Obviously all of the above was B.S. Aside from a few quirks I'm a great guy to hang out with. Let's chat!

Mr Determined

I have been talking to a guy that seems really nice. I have known from the beginning it is not going to work but he seemed like a guy that would be a great friend.

I started talking to him yesterday. During the course of the conversation he asked about the guys I have met on the site so I explained that I have a blog to share about the crazies!!! At this point he let me know he was determined to make the blog......I believe his thoughts were to be a Non - Crazy...but I don't think it would work.

Today my niece was born. This is a very special time in our family. It is exciting, intense, and emotional experience. I posted updates on my facebook page and personal touches or reaching out to people were to my family and REALLY CLOSE friends!!!   I am emotionally drained and physically tired and close friends and family are all I have really wanted to talk to.......and the I get this message from this guy that I talk to for the first time yesterday that said, "You obviously don't like me because I have not heard from you and I am just wanting to know about your niece." REALLY!!! Yesterday I thought he was joking about some things and he made it known that he was not joking. If I wasn't too tired and emotionally drained I think I might have replied back...SERIOUSLY!!!!  and then explode on him about my day and how I really only want my family and closest friends around me today. However, since I am tired and emotionally drained I am going to ignore this message.

In Box is Full ~~~~ of the same ole stuff!!!

The Momma's boy has sent a message with his phone number wanting to me to call him...I don't know if I have mentioned him but he lives with his mom and does not have a job. He also has already told  me he is need major dental work done.

HOTDADDY!!! or so he calls himself. He is the 55 year old guy that is married and is looking for a good time. My profile title is "Texas Girl looking for a Texas Boy" and he replies today with "what about a Texas Man. I am in such a mood that I want to reply "You mean a Texas Grandpa" but once again I will just ignore his message...

more guys not from Texas......

The best one today!!!!!!! He put in his profile that he weighs 116 pounds...REALLY!!! Okay so I am not willing to put my weight on this site...but it is safe to say that you can look at me and know that I am not 116 pounds....why would a guy brag about that on his profile!! Yeah definitely a Kermit!! *on to the next*

Dear Santa We Need to Talk!!!!

I know that I recently wrote to you on facebook that I wanted the Exhilarate Zumba DVD's and a dear friend provided those instead....

So I decided that I have not because I ask not....so I asked for a Diamond Ring for that finger....(you know the one) but it dawned on me this morning that we need to talk.......The guy behind that ring has to be worth having....and needs to be from Texas.....you know what I like........

I am afraid that the guy that just messaged me will not due.......While his below is funny.....I am looking for someone a little different...


hi how r u, hows ur day, u r so beautifull nd sexy, really i like u, if u smile u look more beautifull, i send u one smile,
one small kid write to santa clause
SEND ME A BROTHER
santa wrote back
SEND ME UR MOTHER

Police Officer Returns - almost a year later!!

Today I got a message from the Police Officer that wanted me to come over to his house before meeting him. (You remember - the one that wanted to meet me at the back of the Wal-Mart parking lot with no bra on - CRAZY!!!)


Well, almost a year later and he sends me a message to ask me how I am doing. I respond Okay and ask him how he is doing. He eventually tells me that we should meet up tonight. Honestly this sounds good just to be doing something different and not be alone so I asked where.....He responds his house. I reply "Not going to happen" I haven't heard a word from him since.

I wonder if we will be doing this dance a year from now.....Guess he thought I changed my mind!!

Mr Texas Football = Done

I keep trying to talk to him but all I get out of him is:

You like bowling?
You are an angel today
I like bowling?
You like Southlake football?
I like bowling
I like Southlake football
I like cat
Go Horn

Serioiusly this is how are conversations go and I have answered the same questions SEVERAL times!!!!